THE FANTASTIC FOUR’S GALACTUS WILL BE PLAYED BY RALPH INESON. HERE’S HOW HE COMPARES TO INESON’S OTHER ICONIC VILLAIN, THE OFFICE SALES REP CHRIS FINCH
ROUND ONE: GENERAL KNOWLEDGE
GALACTUS: Born in the sixth incarnation of the pre-Big Bang universe, the entity known as Galactus spent billions of years absorbing data from across the cosmos. Effectively omniscient, his general knowledge is presumably solid and he would be a welcome addition to any pubquiz team.
FINCHY: One of the most revered pubquizzers in the Thames Valley region, Finchy is a proud graduate of the University of Life. The Leeds-born rep reads “a book a week” and his general knowledge spans history, science, art and the distinction between arachnids and insects (eight legs/six legs).
WINNER: FINCHY
ROUND TWO: PHYSICAL STRENGTH
GALACTUS: Clocking in at 28’ 9” and weighing a whopping 18.2 tons, this cosmic giant is a force to be reckoned with. Over the course of his absurdly long life, Galactus has bested the likes of Odin, Thanos and Ultron in combat, and is rightly considered “nails” as a result.
FINCHY: “Clever and funny” is how Finchy’s best friend David Brent once described him. But Brent neglected to mention Chris’ third quality: strength. Finchy has successfully thrown both a kettle and a shoe over a pub, which is easily as impressive as roughing up a purple alien.
WINNER: TIE
ROUND THREE: PLANET CONSUMPTION
GALACTUS: Known to pals as the ‘Devourer of Worlds’, Galactus’ favourite food is planets. Sustaining his energy levels by chowing down on vast astronomical bodies teeming with sentient life, this helmet-sporting demigod has
