Clare Rolt delves into some triedand-tested ways of integrating into the local French community
One of our basic human needs is to belong. Gaining a sense of place, connecting with people and developing friendships – according to Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs – is one of the most important things for people to be able to feel motivated and, above all, happy.
So, how do you do this in a new country where you may not speak the language and you perhaps don’t know anyone? You may be leaving behind the place you grew up, close friendship groups and family, to start your new life in France. So where do you start trying to gain that sense of belonging that is so important for wellbeing and mental health?
It’s something I had to do more than 16 years ago with my husband and one-year-old daughter. We decided to leave our home town, where we’d grown up, where all of our family and friends were, to start out in France. With the house chosen and work established, we set about meeting people and embracing the French way of life. Here are our tried-andtested ways of getting to know people and gaining a sense of belonging in our new home.
GET TO KNOW THE LOCALS
This is the first step towards starting to feel integrated and showing that you want to become part of the community. It could be that first smile and hello to a friendly face while out walking the dog, a brief exchange as you see each other in the village or inviting your neighbours over for an aperitif to introduce yourselves.
However you choose to take that initial move, showing that you’re friendly, willing to make the effort, regardless or not of whether you speak the language, is really important.
PARTICIPATE IN LOCAL EVENTS
Most villages hold regular events as a way of bringing people together and raising money for the local commune. When we first moved to France, our neighbours invited us to all sorts of village get-togethers, which we consistently went to. From moules-frites to paella evenings, and from summer barbecues to winter cassoulet – all delicious meals served in the local salle des fêtes while listening to the local band.
We found it was a great way to begin to build relationships with the people in our village, who evidently saw us as new people willing to embrace their way of life. Such events are often advertised on posters at the town hall or around the village, on social media or in magazines at the tourist office.
From tea dances to organised hikes and bingo, there’s plenty going on whatever the season and size of village.
EVERYONE LOVES A VOLUNTEER!
As time goes on and you get to know the locals, you can become part of the committee that helps to organise village events, or just simply offer to lend an extra pair of hands.
Friends of ours who retired to France always help out at
