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Gwyneth Paltrow recently reaffirmed her positive feeling s about blended families. And where kids are involved, befriending your ex’s new partner is a good idea, says Rebecca Cox
GWYNETH PALTROW recently gave us an insight into her friendship with Dakota Johnson, her ex-husband Chris Martin’s partner, when she shared a sweet photo of herself and Dakota holding hands. Unlike Gwyneth and Chris, I did not consciously uncouple from my ex-husband. After more than a decade together and with a one-year-old at home, when we separated there were EastEnders-worthy moments. But seven years on, I’ve built a life I love for me and my son and I think I’m ready to embrace my inner Gwyneth.
My ex lives with his girlfriend and is very much a part of my son’s (and therefore my) life. Did I imagine us being one big , happy blended family ? Me popping in for a cup of tea at handover times, the occasional Sunday lunch and even a cosy Christmas all together ? Honestly, yes. Has it happened? No. At least, not yet.
However, I will be spending Christmas morning with my son and his dad and possibly even an in-law or two, with an open invitation for the Dakota in my life to join the party as well, or the offer to step back if my presence is not welcome. Because when it comes to blended families, leading with love (and a healthy dose of self-awareness) is the best decision for your children. Not having the perfect family Christmas I always pictured felt so hard at first but, once I had grieved the life I thought I’d have, I found that rewriting the rule book on what Christmas ‘should’ look like was freeing. I love my blended, bitty, timetabled holidays just as they are.
It helps that I had a model single mum and a wonderful stepmum. I’ve never seen them holding hands, but
