As comedian Hope Woodard’s live show makes headlines, Georgia Aspinall unpicks why her rebrand of celibacy has become 2024’s hot new trend
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THE FIRST TIME I took a year off dating , I was 23 and had just realised the guy I was friends-with-benefiting with didn’t actually care whether I lived or died. I had pretended for too long that I didn’t want him to fall in love with me and my pride simply couldn’t take the hit that he didn’t. I had also realised that one-night stands weren’t all they were cracked up to be, female orgasm often an afterthought (or rather, an after-he-leaves), so I did what any slightly dramatic 20-something would do and swore off dating entirely, resigning myself to celibacy for the next year. It was the most peaceful year of my life.
Now, 2024 is ushering in a new celibacy era, but with a rebrand. Going ‘ boysober’ means abstaining from romantic relationships to unlearn toxic dating habits.
Popularised by Brooklyn-based comedian Hope Woodard, who has a show of the same name, she says it encompasses all genders.
‘To me, the word “celibate” is so religious and not at all modern,’ explains Woodard. ‘There’s a purity aspect to it that still centres men, like you’re celibate until you find someone, whereas “ boysober” means to really detach from men and male validation.’
It comes as figures show a rise in celibacy among Gen Z. In 2021, researchers found that 18 to 23-year-olds were having significantly less casual sex than people of the same age a decade earlier – and a recent Bumble sur vey showed 34% of users are not having sex. The hashtag #celibacyjourney has nearly 40 million views on TikTok, and #boysober already has four million. The French aren’t at it, either, as, according to a new study, France is suffering from ‘an unprecedented decline’ in sexual activity.
Woodard committed to going ‘ boysober’ – a term coined by her sister – last October after a series of failed ‘sit
