With a loneliness epidemic rising alongside the pandemic, HFM asks the experts why and finds out how podcasts can ease the pain
WORDS DOMINIC BLISS PHOTOGRAPH ISTOCK BY GETTY IMAGES
‘T he Covid-19 pandemic has made even more of us feel lonely. Sadly, people who were already isolated and lonely may become more vulnerable than ever.’
So says Olivia Field, head of health and resilience policy at the British Red Cross. Her worries are backed up by recent surveys. One, conducted on behalf of the Mental Health Foundation, found that a quarter of the UK population felt lonely, with those aged 18 to 34, the unemployed, full-time students or single parents most affected. Another, conducted by Censuswide (on behalf of Buzz Bingo), discovered that ‘one in two Brits currently feel lonelier than they ever have before in their life’, with Londoners and millennials suffering more than other demographic groups.
Neil Wilkie is a psychotherapist, relationships expert and creator of an online programme called The Relationship Paradigm. He fears that loneliness afflicts men more than women because of the age-old problem of males finding it harder to be in touch with their emotions. ‘It’s partly cultural and partly the way we are brought up. The phrase “real men don’t cry” still resonates.’
By forcing many of us to work from home, and by killing our social lives, the pandemic has exacerbated men’s loneliness. And as Wilkie points out, men are far less likely than women to relieve lockdown loneliness through group video calls, for example, or by taking walks with a friend.
He worries about the effects this pandemic-induced isolation is having on men’s mental health, in particular the adrenal stress it causes. ‘The long-term impact of adrenal stress can be weight gain and diabetes,’ he warns. Combine this with a work-from-home diet and poor exercise habits, and health deteriorates further. ‘We’re likely to put on weight, get less fit and almost give up trying,’ Wilkie adds. ‘I worry the impact of loneliness is going to resonate for generations.’ In some cases, the lockdown has also separated men from their partners. Wilkie worries this will impact their sexual health. ‘There will be a lot of frustration and resentment,’ he adds.
So what remedies does he suggest? One way to alleviate loneliness, he says, is through listening to podcasts. ‘Mental stimulation is really important to stop our brains from festering. Podcasts require attention. With them you engage on a more complete level than you do watching Netflix, for example.’
Wilkie recommends podcasts
