PATIENT REAL LIFE
Keylin Akuchie, 25, took holding out for Mr Right to all new levels...
Puckering up, there were a few questions that immediately ruined the moment.
‘What kind of kiss are we going for?’ my fiancé Eleazer, now 25, swooned. ‘Long? A peck? Are we going straight in for tongue?’
‘Let’s just make sure we are on the same page,’ I teased. ‘No tongue, three seconds.’
Despite my rising heart rate and obvious sexual tension, I knew we couldn’t kiss just yet. Not until the altar.
Unlike other people my age, instead of having a first kiss as an early teen, I’d never made out with anyone else.
And Eleazer hadn’t either. In fact, even though we’d been in a relationship in Texas, for 17 amazing months, a rock on my finger by January 2023, we’d never smooched. No peck and no making out. Although, there was no denying that I wanted to.
Just two dates in, we decided we wanted to take the religious concept of no sex before marriage to anew extreme.
By nipping any intimacy in the bud early on, it meant that we could focus on understanding one another.
Plus, not having an interest in dating in the past, I knew that the first person I would kiss would be my husband.
So many of my friends used causal sex as a plaster.
If they felt anxious, needed to make up after an argument or were too uncomfortable to talk about their feelings, they’d rely on sex as an answer.
Only, I didn’t want that. Something that Eleazer agreed with and accepted.
However, we soon realised that resisting the urge was harder than we first imagined.
He was the first man that I’d ever been sexually attracted to.
Yet, I had to ignore what my body was telling me, including all the butterflies, and stick to my beliefs.
So, we set out a plan. ‘If we are going to see one another, it’s good to go out in public,’ I suggested. ‘And if you are coming over, you need to leave before bedtime.’
We made sure to hang out with other people, limiting the time spent as just us two.
I had to ignore what my body said
We lived separately and never had a sleepover.
However, there were some subtle temptations that we couldn’t avoid.
A cuddle here and there, holding hands and a forehead kiss all had the green light.
Of course, if you put two people who were attracted to one another in the same room, there was bound to be huge sexual tension.
Butterflies, nerves and everything in between.
Only, I knew it would be worth the wait.
Especially when Eleazer popped the question on 8 January 2023 after we’d been dating for a year.
Waking up that morning, we attended a pottery class and went for frozen yoghurt,
