ramp - EN Magazine

11 October 2021

For our English readers, a little lesson on regional differences in Germany: Here at ramp, we’re in southern Germany. And at the risk of playing into overused stereotypes and worn-out clichés, southern Germans are usually considered to be more open and warm than their northern German counterparts. But . . . we love the northern Germans. True, they are generally seen as reserved and often quite blunt, real enthusiasm being totally foreign to them. If they ever do feel excited about something or find someone particularly likeable, they might say, “Wow, you’re not all that bad after all.” Their manner of greeting further reinforces this impression. For northern Germans, a slight nod of the head is often enough. Or, if they’re feeling especially talkative, they might even let a curt “Moin!” escape their lips. And here’s the great thing: “Moin” is a magic word. It means “hi”, “hello”, “good morning”, “good evening” and everything in between. It means “How are you?” as much as “Fancy seeing you here!” “Moin!” is a greeting for all occasions. And the only correct reply to “Moin!” is . . . also “Moin!”. Though on Mondays, a simple “Oh, shut up!” is often used as a response instead. Northern Germans are also uniquely capable of distinguishing between different types of mud, with a distinct word for oozy mud, sandy mud and mud that’s somewhere in between. Which brings us to the theme of the magazine you now hold in your hands. Because the word for northern Germany’s extensive coastal mudflats is “Watt”. If you’re a regular ramp reader, you’ll know we have a penchant for odd trains of thought. So: from cultural differences to curt greetings to types of mud to the SI unit of power. To the wordplay with “what”. Because “Say what?” is a perfect reply to many suggestions in our present time. As an alternative. As a way to save energy and resources. As a good antidote against hasty decisions, naive bravado and chaotic hyperactivism. We are, as the German band Elements of Crime sings, always energized, always on the go and always too late. The scientific term for this systematic misconception is action bias. The northern German mentality represents an ideal of composure, unagitated and relaxed, at peace with oneself. Not acting, keeping still, waiting. In many situations, that is the better choice. Careful consideration. Wait and see. With a dry sense of humor as an added bonus. Taking things seriously, but not too seriously. With that in mind, here’s wishing you lots of reading pleasure with ramp#55!