T3’s lean, mean tech machine provides all kinds of solutions
Q ED BREDLINGTON, FROME
A Presuming you’ve either been told by a trained professional that you’re okay to follow a keto diet or have fully read Dr Guru’s A4 pamphlet on the many benefits of kidney stones, low blood pressure, and nutrient deficiencies, then yes. There are things. Not ‘magically get your diet right’ things – that’s on you – but items that can prepare the kinds of food you’ll be eating on a depressingly regular basis.
The VonShef Egg Boiler (about £27) can boil 16 eggs at once, which seems excessive even for you, reader. It can also poach them, cook up a couple of omelettes, or steam veg if you pop in the proper tray. Basically an essential keto tool, if ever there was one. And seeing as your burger consumption is highly likely to be skyrocketing, a proper burger press in which to mash your mince is essential. Grillaholics’ £14 Stuffed Burger Press gives you plenty of options, particularly if you like your patties full of… stuff.
The VonShef Egg Boiler can boil 16 eggs, poach them, cook up a couple of omelettes, or steam veg if you pop in the tray
Guru recommends a good kitchen counter grill for cooking. Perhaps you’ll go for the £200 Sage BBQ & Press Grill, with its flat and griddled surfaces? Don’t overlook the venerable George Foreman, either, because the Medium Smokeless Grill (£110) is easily cleaned and can supply you with a ready source of dripped-off fat suitable for other cooking.
Speaking of which, the final essential is the Bacon Bin (£25), a little silicone tub crowned by a pig’s face and, just beneath, a strainer: pour your grease on top, and it’ll separate the bits, leaving pure delicious fat behind. Yum.
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Q OWEN, VIA EMAIL
A Prepare for some top-end prognostication from Mystic Guru, folks. The same man who once claimed he would never need anything more than a first-gen Kindle and a pre-HTC dumbphone for his mobile internet needs. The guy that still thinks Betamax is due a comeback, and who guffawed at the idea of EVs based on the milk float that Alan the local milkman would use to hoon down the ring road. Pinches of salt at the ready.
Yes, they’re the future. They are. There will come a day when just about everyone augments their heads with some kind of device. Walking around with one red eye like a damaged T-800 will be commonplace. Perhaps we’ll also get to enjoy a persistent social credit system (with Guru at the bottom of the leaderboard, naturally) or at least get to sling poop emojis at those around us with merely a glance. Who knows?
The potential applications of AR, particularly fully-networked with 5G and every bell and whistle available,
