A uvalde mother turns rage and grief into action

4 min read

BY JASMINE AGUILERA

Lexi’s parents, top and bottom left, honor her with tattoos, clothing, photos, and decorating her grave site
CHRISTOPHER LEE FOR TIME

ON A DRIZZLY DECEMBER EVENING IN WASHINGTON, D.C., Kimberly Mata-Rubio marched from Union Station to Capitol Hill with dozens of other families from Uvalde, Texas. Her 10-year-old daughter Lexi Rubio was murdered in the shooting at Robb Elementary School on May 24. Mata-Rubio had never been on a plane before the shooting, but this was now her seventh trip to Washington in as many months to pressure lawmakers to pass restrictions on assault weapons. When the march ended, Mata-Rubio, 33, was weeping.

This is not the vocation that Mata-Rubio envisioned for herself, but it is now her future. While she’s taking on the legislative battles, she is also navigating her complicated and painful grief. She is mourning the loss of her daughter—but also the loss of the life she and her family had before the shooting. “Who I was before ceased to exist the moment Lexi died,” Mata-Rubio says, sitting on a bench outside the U.S. Capitol on Dec. 8 in between meetings with lawmakers. “This new me, it’s difficult figuring it out.” As mass shootings in the U.S. become increasingly common—there have been more than 400 in the U.S. since May 24, according to the Gun Violence Archive—she says it should be clear that her anguish could become any other parent’s as well. “I would receive comments, something along the lines of ‘I can’t imagine what you’re going through,’” she says. “And I’m like, well, no. As a mom or a dad, you can imagine . . . Only when you imagine my pain will you join me in fighting.”

CHRISTMAS EVE MARKED seven months since Lexi and 18 other children and two teachers were killed by a gunman. Normally, Lexi would help her father Felix Rubio decorate the outside of their home for the holidays. They’d drink hot chocolate with marshmallows and watch Christmas movies together. This year, the family decorated Lexi’s grave site with Christmas lights and giant candy canes.

For decades, no mass shooting produced meaningful changes to gun law on Capitol Hill. Dec. 14 was the 10th anniversary of a gunman killing 20 children and six adults at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Conn., an event that many thought would lead to federal changes to gun policy, which never panned out. Uvalde was different: President Joe Biden in June signed into law the most significant gun-reform bill in nearly three decades, which enhances background checks for young gun buyers and funds mental-health

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