Smart with money
Forget taking a lover, the real midlife fantasy is moving in with your pals. Find out what it’s like – and what you need to consider
We’ve all dreamt of moving in with our friends – even if it’s just a flight of fancy. The fun! The freedom! Whether you’re single or weary of living with the same person, it could offer you a new lease of life. A grown-up version of those student days or your first flatshare – except with more space and money, and no need to stick your name on the milk.
Actor Joanna Lumley – married for 35 years – has declared she and her friends have a plan: ‘Rather than reach the stage where we’re old and alone, we plan to buy a big house, install a housekeeper and enjoy our twilight years.’
We can all dream, but in reality, what would midlife cohabiting truly be like? Sally Mae Joseph knows, because in 2016, she and two friends bought a house together in Seaford, East Sussex.
‘It all started over a drink in the pub with a friend I’d met through the local choir. I was 65, divorced, with four grown-up kids and nine grandchildren, and I wanted to retire from teaching calligraphy.
‘I’d been thinking of downsizing to release equity from my house, but when my widowed friend said she’d been mulling over the prospect of buying a house with female friends, we began to get excited. It felt like a huge adventure when four of us started house-hunting, though other people thought we were nuts. We were able to look at big houses that would have been beyond my wildest dreams on my own. And our enthusiasm was undiminished, even when one dropped out, realising she couldn’t face sharing a kitchen.
‘When a detached house with four en-suite bedrooms came on the market, we fell in love. It had huge rooms, a beautiful, landscaped garden, and a garage I could convert into an art studio. If we sold our modest homes, we could afford a three-way split of the equity. Perfect! We agreed on our bedrooms there and then.
With the help of a solicitor, we drew up a deed of trust that tied us into the property, with financial penalties if any of us wanted to leave before three years were up. Three months later, we moved in and threw a birthday party for 100 guests.
