SUZIE HAYMAN AND SUSAN QUILLIAM CAN HELP
Help! I’m jealous of his female friend
Q After being single for years, I’ve just met a lovely new man at work. But he has a long-time woman friend he sees regularly, though he swears they’ve never been an item. He introduced us recently and she’s nice, but I’m still wary of her. Surely they can’t have been friends this long and never had anything romantic going on? Should I insist my man stop seeing her?
SUSAN SAYS
A No. As the new girl in town you don’t have the right to tell your man to drop his friends – and, if you do, he has the right to object and drop you. Plus, you’ve likely no need to panic – if he and his friend were going to get involved, it would have happened by now. Better to make friends with her, reassuring yourself and reducing the chances she’ll make a move on your man.
She’s grieving – but this is unreasonable
Q Two years ago my daughter had a miscarriage. Because they couldn’t cope with the sight of all the baby items they’d bought, they stored them in our spare room. We have now offered to pay for storage since we only have a small house and need the room for guests. My daughter became mad and is being unreasonable.
SUZIE SAYS
A Grief is unreasonable. But you are right in wanting your needs to be recognised too. I wonder whether you could have a conversation with your son-in-law on his own. Make it clear you really do feel for them in their loss and understand how hard it is. But putting these items into storage, taking them home or indeed considering passing them on to someone who would use them might actually help them to progress.
We don’t want to live together
Q My partner and I have been seeing each other for over a year and everyone assumes that we’ll get married or at least move in together. And in many ways it would be nice, and useful too. But we both have beautiful homes we love, full of memories of our past relationships (we’re both widowed). Living together just doesn’t feel right.
SUZIE SAYS
A You’re not alone. With people living longer and both divorce and bereavement ending some ma
