Ex attacked me with a monkey wrench

Packing the last few bits into the suitcase, I zipped it shut. It was summer 2007 and my husband, Mark, and I were taking our daughter, Elizabeth*, then two, away for a week in Newquay.

It was just what we all needed. Lately, I’d noticed that Mark seemed stressed. He worked as data engineer and I’d put it down to him feeling tired. He struggled to sleep and was always up in the middle of the night, having a cigarette in the garden.

‘I’m fine,’ he always shrugged when I asked if he was OK. But I was worried.

We’d met in 2000 at our local pub, and married two years later. Then our daughter arrived in December 2004. Life had been busy, so this break, I hoped, would help Mark to relax a little.

Only, just before our trip, Mark called my mobile from work.

‘I’ve spent all of the holiday money,’ he confessed.

‘You’ve done what?’ I gasped.

‘I’m sorry,’ he said.

Mark was so frivolous with money, and I was furious. ‘It won’t happen again,’ he promised, and like a fool I believed him.

Somehow, we scraped together the money to go away, but it wasn’t the same. No cash for ice creams or rides at the fair. Instead, we had to count every penny.

Back home, a few weeks later, I was out buying some crockery, but when I tried to pay, the woman on the checkout frowned.

‘Sorry, your card has been declined,’ she said.

‘That can’t be right,’ I replied. Mark worked hard and I had a good job with a printing firm. I was sure there was plenty of money in the account.

‘It’s probably just a problem with the bank,’ Mark said when I confronted him. But deep down, I knew he’d spent it. And when he finally admitted it, I was so angry. ‘I’m sorry,’ he muttered.

We struggled on for another few years, but were arguing non-stop and Mark blamed me for everything, saying it was my fault we had problems.

In the end we divorced in 2011, but we agreed to remain friends for the sake of Elizabeth, then six.

I let Mark have a key to the house, and he even walked our Dalmatian, Oscar. As the years passed, it was difficult at times. Then, as Elizabeth reached her teens, she made her own arrangements with Mark and I stayed out of it.

I hoped Mark and I could both move on. Instead, he started blaming me for every problem he had. If he struggled to pay his rent, he’d say it was because I’d demanded too much child support.

Even a quiet night out with my friends in September 2019 was ruined by him. I’d just