Age is just a number

As Eva Cassidy’s Who Knows Where the Time Goes played in the background, I strummed on my guitar before singing along. It was October 2017 and, feeling brave, I recorded myself on my phone and uploaded the video to Facebook. I’d been playing the guitar since I was 11 and had been in a few bands. Now, though, I was working in administration in a dental practice, so it was just a hobby. Still, when people on my Facebook page complimented me on my singing voice, it felt good, and when a man called Haithem wrote, ‘You have a beautiful voice,’ I felt flattered. ‘Thanks,’ I posted back.

Clicking onto his profile, I saw that he was good-looking but very young – early 30s, maybe. I was in the process of separating from my husband of 24 years, who I had two grown-up sons with.

The last thing on my mind was romance, but when Haithem started messaging me privately and speaking about his life in Tunisia, I felt strangely drawn to him. He sent me photos of his home, and with miles of luscious, rolling fields, it was beautiful. I told him a bit about my life in Canada, my love of music, and my beloved Jack Russell, Jack.

Haithem wrote in broken English, but it was endearing – and he seemed really mature for his age. The next day, he messaged me again – and this time we chatted away for five hours. ‘How old are you? I’m 53,’ I wrote eventually. ‘You don’t look your age,’ he replied, confessing he was 32.

‘I don’t think age really matters anyway,’ he added. But Haithem was 21 years younger than me. My sons were 27 and 25 – what would they think? I quickly shook away the notion of anything romantic ever happening – besides, he lived halfway across the world. Still, we continued to chat, and I loved how devoted he was to his family.

After a few days, it was like we’d known each other our whole lives, and from then on we spoke every day, including video calling each other for hours. The more we spoke, the more I felt a connection with him. ‘I really like you,’ he eventually confessed to me. ‘I like you too,’ I replied. I felt like a teenager with a crush, and I was desperate to meet him in person.

But first, I had to speak to my sons. ‘Mum, you need to make sure he’s a real person and not a catfish,’ said my oldest, Matt.* Wa