Real life
Three women open up about the most positive influences in their lives
HEADSHOT OF KATE HOYLE: BECKY WRIGHT
‘Thanks to my daughter, I found my purpose’
Kate Hoyle, 59, is a clinical hypnotherapist, from north-west London, where she lives with her husband David, 60. They have two grown-up children, Nellie, 23, and Ethan, 20.
Our daughter Nellie was diagnosed with clinical anxiety and depression when she was 12 years old. What followed were difficult years of school absence, physical illness, an eating disorder and the terror of what might happen. She had a lengthy wait to be seen by the Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services (CAMHS), and she was under the service for a long time.
Every time I heard about a potential therapy or an intervention, I’d whisk her off to try it. None of it made much difference until she tried rapid transformational therapy when she was 16. It’s a form of hypnotherapy, which is like inserting a USB device into your mind and running a reprogramme. The results blew us away. Things became better at school and socially.
When she was 18, Nellie was diagnosed with ADHD, and everything started to make sense. She went to university, which we thought she’d never do. She gained a first in Psychology and flew solo to Australia.
She’s researched and worked hard to find out what works for her, and shared insights in a vlog, because she wants to help others.
Nellie finds ways of getting around challenges and is the reason I now work with teenagers.
I had a career in the City before and never dreamt I’d be a therapist.
As a parent, I’d struggled to find support, and other families tell me it is helpful to have someone who understands and has been through similar things. I felt so lost and lonely when Nellie was younger, so I’m very committed to supporting other parents.
I don’t just want people to have a chat and feel better, I want to see a fundamental shift and, when I do, it’s incredible. I love my work – it’s almost like I’d been looking my whole life for what I was supposed to be doing. Now, I’ve found it, I tell my family.
If I ever feel like giving up on something, I think of Nellie and it motivates me to keep going – she truly inspires me.
‘My furry companion has taught me resilience’
Gabriella Goddard, 57, founder of Brainsparker Creativity app, lives in London with her dog Chico and her cat Sasha.
‘I wouldn’t be without Chico,’ I tell my friends. He’s the crazy springer spaniel I rescued while I lived in Spain 13 years ago.
When the mechanic fixing my car asked if I wanted a free dog – he was trying to rehome two puppies that had been abandoned – I declined. I’d patted Chico and looked into his deep eyes, but I’m a cat person. Ten minutes
