We also interviewed researchers, therapists and a tantric sex coach to bring you an alphabetised intimacy explainer. Consider this your ultimate guide
A
is for ANORGASMIA
Granted, orgasms can be as elusive as a sunny bank holiday. But if reaching your pleasurable peak is proving to be a consistent challenge, there could be another explanation. ‘Anorgasmia is difficulty reaching orgasm after ample sexual stimulation,’ says Belinda Griffiths, GP at Fleet Street Clinic. Causes vary, but certain medications, hormonal flux, psychological crises and gynaecological issues are all chief offenders. If you suspect anorgasmia, your GP should be your first port of call, says Dr Griffiths. And if you get the allclear but you still can’t climax? Sex coaching and therapy is the next step. Expect a combination of CBT to address psychological barriers and guidance on pleasure, masturbation and partnered sex positions.
B
is for BIMBOFICATION
The term began as a fetish in which 'plain' women altered their looks to conform to a sex object aesthetic (think: Jessica Rabbit). However, over time, misogynists and incels – an online community of men who are involuntarily celibate – began using the phrase to mourn the ‘loss’ of ‘respectable’ women and shame those who embraced femininity. By 2022, bimbofication has had yet another rebrand, becoming a way of reclaiming hyper-femininity and female sexuality outside of the male gaze.
C
is for CLITORIS
Ah, the clitoris. Small but mighty thanks to its 8,000 nerve endings, it’s the only organ with pleasure as its main function. Yet, historic bias in scientific research that prioritises the male anatomy means we still don’t really understand how it works. Dr Griffiths defines the clitoris as ‘a small organ situated in the vulva between the labia minora’. But the glans clitoris (the part you see) is just the tip of the nice-berg. The internal clitoris comprises the clitoral body, vestibular bulbs and the crura, which, like their external counterparts, are made up of erectile tissue. No wonder it’s one of the body’s most sensitive zones.
D
is for DIGISEXUALITY
Tinder, Bumble, Hinge, porn: tech and sex are compatible bedfellows. But going online to get your kicks does not make you a digisexual. ‘What distinguishes digisexual as a sexual identity is that they find their connection with technology to be very close to the connections we would make with human partners,’ says Neil McArthur, a sexual identity researcher. With tech developments making it easier than ever to omit real-world relationships (think: VR porn, AI partners, sex robots), the future for digisexuals is looking (ahem) fully charged.
E
is for EDGING
