OUR TALENTED TEAM ARE HERE TO HELP SOLVE YOUR PROBLEMS
SUZIE HAYMAN
Solves all your family dilemmas
SUSAN QUILLIAM
Sex, love and relationship expert
EMMA MARCHINGTON
Our vet helps you and your pet
KALPANA FITZPATRICK
Personal finance expert for moneyweek.com
Help! Am I ugly ‘down below’?
Q I’m 53 and just back on the dating apps. Yesterday, for the first time in my life, I took a look at my ‘bits’ by opening my legs and posing in front of my full-length mirror. Now I’m sorry I did. I’m red and wrinkly down there, like a plucked chicken – and I’m convinced that no man will want to make love to me when I look like that. Can you help at all?
SUSAN SAYS
A As you’ve never seen your genitals before – in fact, may not even have seen pictures of women’s genitals before – you likely don’t realise you’re normal. Yes, everyone’s genitals – female and male – are ‘red and wrinkly’. The way your ‘bits’ deliver pleasure is far more important than how they look. So don’t panic – any future partner won’t be judging you, but will instead be focussing on the pleasure you give and receive. Please relax and enjoy.
He insists that I go on top!
Q My boyfriend and I have been together for three months now and have a great sex life – with only one problem. I’ve never liked to go ‘on top’ in bed because that position hurts me. But my boyfriend says I’m holding back from real intimacy and that means I’m not committed to our relationship. In fact, last weekend he accused me of not loving him. So how can I convince him that I do care?
SUSAN SAYS
A Your letter worries me. It sounds as if your boyfriend is not only refusing to take your word for why you don’t want to go ‘on top’, he’s also emotionally pressuring you to do that even though it’s physically painful for you. Rather than trying to convince him of your love, explain one more time that you won’t do what he wants. Then, if he still keeps on pushing, walk away and don’t look back.
I want to cut all contact with my mum
Q I’m getting to the stage where I don’t want to have any contact with my mum ever again. I feel silly to have come to this but even though I am a confident, 55-year-old businesswoman with adult children, she reduces me to a whimpering child in a few swift words. My loving husband pointed out that she criticises everything I do or say, and, most of all, trivialises everything. And my mum has always done so – she’s no different with me now than she was when I was a child. My children back my husband and say that we should stop seeing her.
SUZIE SAYS
A I’m so glad you have a family who can see what s
