From your social life to your body image, discover how you can make some positive changes
Insecurity damaging your relationships? Is fear of not being liked making you feel lonely? It’s more common than you might think. In fact, 85% of women do not believe they’re attractive, while 56% don’t think they’re liked by others*. But having low self-esteem isn’t a lost cause. There are many ways to boost confidence and happiness. First, you need to recognise which areas to tackle. Take our quiz to find out how...
Your social life
Tick the statements that apply to you:
Attending a dinner party where I know no one is a nightmare.
When friends show me pictures of fun nights out, I feel jealous. I often get a nagging feeling that I don’t know enough about politics/the arts/world affairs to contribute to a conversation. When I meet someone new, I worry they’ll find me boring. If I haven’t seen a friend in a while, I get concerned that the friendship is fizzling out.
TICKED THREE OR MORE?
It may mean other people make you feel inadequate. Psychotherapist and coach Karen Meager has this advice:
✢ Ears are your secret weapon
‘Concentrate on listening rather than worrying too much about yourself,’ she says. ‘Taking the focus off you and putting your attention onto them can quickly blitz anxiety.’
✢ Be social-media savvy
If social media makes you feel like everyone else is always busy, reduce the time you spend on it. ‘And remember that people only share what they want to share – no one has a perfect life,’ says Karen.
Your body image
Tick the statements that apply to you:
During sex, I focus on my rolls of tummy flesh and not pleasure. My friends look so much better on social media than I do. My life would be far happier if I had trimmer legs/fewer wrinkles. Insecurities about my looks have stopped me from enjoying time with friends and family.
Shopping for clothes often leaves me feeling dispirited.
TICKED THREE OR MORE?
You’re not alone – four in 10 British women have hang-ups, according to a YouGov survey.
Here’s Karen’s advice on managing your insecurities:
✢ Accept compliments
‘If someone tells you your hair is looking great or that a dress looks brilliant on you, practise saying “Thank you,” even if you’re not really feeling it, This will foster confidence.’
✢ Be kind to yourself
‘Most people don’t notice your flaws – we tend to magnify them. Stand in front of a mirror in your underwear and look with an appreciative, not critical eye – it’s all about perception. Focus on what you like, not what you don’t like.
Your career
Tick the statements that apply to you:
Making small talk with customers f
