More older women are putting themselves back out there. But how does seeking a second shot at love marry up with a digitised dating world?
In 1982, the words ‘dick pic’ would have meant little to Anna Brown. ‘Maybe there was a boy called Richard, who went by Dick, in my brother’s class at school?’ she offers, innocently. ‘But I never knew that part of him.’ Anna grins. Unlike her sweet-minded 17-year-old self, who met the boy who would become her first husband while playing pool in a Glasgow youth club, 58-year-old Anna has spent the past 12 months ‘on the apps’. ‘I found myself twice-divorced, missing male company and looking for a reason to wear a foxy dress on a Saturday night – but with no single men in my demographic any where to be seen.’ So, she joined Hinge and prepared herself for what her 26-year-old daughter warned would be a… visual experience. ‘Admittedly, I wasn’t expecting visuals from down there,’ she laughs. ‘Though that now horrifies me less than receiving persistent interest from men who are 30 years younger or older than me, racist jokes and chat about golf.’
There was a time when Anna – a Gen X-er actively embracing the dating scene, and using the same tech as Gen Z to do so – would have been an outlier. Today, she’s in good company. The days of enduring a relationship that’s past its sell-by date are long gone. The number of women in England and Wales divorcing aged 65 and over rose by 38% between 2005 and 2015; a trend replicated in the US, where splits of couples aged 50-plus have doubled since the 90s, as well as in Australia. There, research company IbisWorld has predicted those born between 1946 and 1964 will be the digital-dating industry’s main growth driver in the coming years. And with a senior dating pool that’s thriving, attitudes are changing; a 2023 study by The Policy Institute at King’s College London found that 30% of boomers approve of no-strings shenanigans.
That re-partnering has had a rebrand might have something to do with it. Successful secondtimers, dubbed ‘later daters’, are the new power couples. See: the rumoured romance between Anna Wintour and Bill Nighy, both 73. ‘In the past, there was a strong societal expectation that marriages should last a lifetime, no matter how unhappy you were,’ explains Rachel MacLynn, a fellow of the British Psychological Society and founder of matchmaking agency Maclynn. ‘There was also an expectation that you should stay single out of respect for your late partner if you were widowed. But today, those expectations are shifting.’ Off the back of a pandemic that reprioritised life goals, she’s also seen an increase in romantic proactivity. ‘That may include being brave enough to leave a spouse and find someone more compatible.’
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