Are you full of Christmas spirit? Or more often channelling your inner Scrooge? Dr Sophie Mort explains why taking time to wish ourselves and others well can transform our wellbeing.
Interview: Ellie Smith
What is loving-kindness meditation?
Kindness is the quality of being generous and caring. Loving describes someone who shows love to other people. Put those words together and we get loving-kindness, the essence of a meditation rooted in compassion (also referred to as ‘metta’ meditation, which dates back to the teaching of Buddha).
How does it compare to mindfulness?
Loving-kindness meditation (LKM) focuses on cultivating love and goodwill toward oneself and others, while mindfulness meditation emphasises observing thoughts and feelings without judgement. All mindfulness-based meditations will, by the very nature of the practice, cultivate a softer, more spacious, kinder mind, but LKM places a deliberate emphasis on this.
Do we undervalue kindness?
Kindness and compassion are often undervalued, as society tends to prioritise personal achievement and success over altruistic qualities. I think there’s also a belief that self-compassion is about being so kind to yourself that you never take responsibility for anything. In truth, offering yourself compassion gives you the best chance at taking responsibility for your actions, and for taking action in your life, as it helps to foster hope.
Compassion breaks the cycle of feeling demotivated by our self-criticism. Without it, we’re at risk of believing that we’re a ‘failure’, that change can’t happen for us, or any of the other untrue things our inner critic says about us.
Who needs this practice?
Ideal candidates for LKM are those seeking to foster positive emotions, compassion and resilience. Without compassion, we might notice that we often feel detached, harsh or overly critical towards oneself and others.
LKM may also be helpful during the festive period when tensions and stresses can run high. It can help us be more compassionate to ourselves when we notice the inner critic creeping in (e.g. we haven’t done everything we think we ‘should’ have done, and start beating ourselves up). It can also help us approach the challenge of seeing any relatives with whom we don’t see eye to eye, with greater compassion and understanding.
Is there evidence to support this practice?
There is scientific evidence that shows LKM increases positive emotions such as hope, joy, contentment an
