FINANCE
The financial comparison trap does more than just make us feel bad. It could be denting our bank balances, too, says Money Talks author Ellie Austin-Williams
Whether we’re conscious of how we compare ourselves with others or not, money and privilege play a huge part in our perception of our place in the world – and comparing ourselves to others is one way that we seek to establish where we fit in. This isn’t a new phenomenon – the idea of social comparison first surfaced in the 1950s. Psychologist Leon Festinger developed ‘social comparison theory’, which is the idea that people determine their own social and personal worth by looking at others and deciding how they stack up against them. But how do we stop ourselves being stuck in negative comparison? And can we even use it for good?
YOU CAN’ T BUY HAPPINESS – OR CAN YOU?
For anyone who’s ever been in a sticky financial situation that leads to stress and worry, coming across the popular quote that money can’t buy happiness can feel like a real sting. The reality is that there are countless situations where money can be the answer to help improve a situation and relieve the panic or anxiety that comes with struggling to make ends meet or keep afloat financially. When you’re deep in the trenches financially, listening to someone who is comfortably off tell you that money won’t make you happy is likely the last thing you want to hear. But here’s the thing: there really is some truth to the saying that money can’t buy happiness. That reason is a little-cited phenomenon that impacts us all – whether we’re one day hoping to increase our bank balance by a month’s salary or a lottery win – and it’s called the hedonic treadmill, or hedonic adaptation.
The crux of the hedonic adaptation model is that when both good and bad things happen, humans tend to return to a set point of happiness and that initial high or low experienced from changes in circumstances fades over time. Have you ever told yourself that if you only had your own house, or got that promotion, or could go on holiday to New York just one time, you’d be happy? We’ve all been there, and it turns out that although those brief moments of achievement feel great, normality soon returns and we return to a level of happiness similar to that of before the event happened. Take a moment to look around you at the life you live now – it might be your friendships, relationships, career, social life, fitness or anything else that comes to mind. Now cast your mind back five or 10 years into the past. Do you remember a time when you dreamed of having some of those things that you have now, which you truly believed would make you happier, yet today they feel like simply part of the usual course of your life? That’s hedonic adaptation in full force.
On top of our own tendencies to look around and see shiny new g
