WORDS: VERONIQUE HAWKSWORTH, LOUISA GREGSON, SAMANTHA BRICK. PHOTOS (MAIN POSED BY MODELS): GETTY, SHUTTERSTOCK
53% of us have done it, according to new research. We ask…
Plenty of us know the feeling – you’ve blocked their number, cried into a packet of tissues and pledged to your friends that you’re moving on. But a few weeks pass, and temptation creeps in to give them a call.
If you’ve ever thought about going back for a fling with an ex, you’re not alone. In fact, new research by Lovehoney found that a staggering 53% of us have continued to sleep with an ex after a break-up. Plus, two-thirds said they try to stay on good terms with their ex after a break-up, with men being more likely to want to stay friends than women. Break-ups are never easy, and there’s no one right way to move on. But is it ever a good idea to have sex with an ex, or is it guaranteed to end in tears? Woman investigates.
‘BEEN THERE AND NEVER REGRETTED IT. THERE’S COMFORT IN INTIMACY WITH SOMEONE YOU KNOW’
Samantha Brick, 52, is a writer from Birmingham and currently lives in south-west France.
I’ve been there, done it and I’ve never regretted it once. And why should I? In fact, I’m willing to bet that most of us women have, at some point, found ourselves back between the sheets with an ex.
While some puritan types might argue it isn’t healthy to do so, I disagree. We might be mums, bosses, daughters, employees and have heavy-duty life commitments, but we’re still hardwired to enjoy sex. And that’s the point here – it’s just sex! With one significant ex of mine, we’ve had sex on a number of occasions. I don’t view any of those moments shared together as an error of judgement or a drunken mistake either.
When my first love and I got together we were only 17. We split two years later, but whenever we saw one another throughout our 20s, we’d end up falling into bed together. It didn’t matter who instigated it because the desire was mutual. After all those years together we’d redefined what it meant to be sexually compatible and knew perfectly well what the other person enjoyed. From the moment we entered the bedroom I knew which music to play and what candles to light. In bed, we knew precisely what to do to turn the other one on. I’d much rather have been with him than having an awkward, random one-night stand with someone with dodgy seduction techniques.
I didn’t have to do the walk of shame home afterwards and neither did I have to worry about whether he’d call or not. I knew he wouldn’t because he was an ex for a reason. In the real world there is a reason w
