SECTION Franchise
TikTok is *obsessed* with cycle syncing. Is it all it ’s cracked up to be?
Blood, sweat and tears My year of obsessive period tracking
Squat shop: the best leggings you can buy Page 53
Why we all need a get the f*ck out fund Page 56
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The bleeding takes me by surprise, as it regularly does. Having moments ago concluded that I have little to offer, my existence is hollow, and I am simply. Not. Good. At. Anything. I feel an almost instantaneous relief. The cramps are right on time. I press two painkillers through their foil casing and flick the taps on the bath: a ritual baptism of sorts.
I know I’m not the only one who can feel at the mercy of their hormones. Memes about being an emotional wreck, then realising your period is due, flit in and out of my DMs like moths in a wardrobe, shared by girlfriends equally as fed up with their monthly ticket to Carrie’s prom as I am.
So, I decide to do something about it. Which is why I find myself sitting on the floor one Sunday afternoon, surrounded by eight other women, scrutinising various types of cervical mucus. I’m not kidding. I’ve spent £35 on a three-hour workshop called ‘Blood, Sweat and Tears’ – ‘an event to empower you with education about your menstrual cycle’. The women around me range from their late twenties to those entering perimenopause. Me? I’m 34. What teacher Laura J Wilkes tells us is basic biology. And yet most of it comes as brandnew information to us all. Wilkes’ theory is that, while men and women have a 24-hour body clock, women’s additional 28(ish)- day cycle means that expecting the same of ourselves every day makes little sense.
Wilkes is just one of a whole host of period coaches (menstrual gurus of sorts) teaching women how to optimise their lives around the ebb and flow of their sex hormones. Many teach that following the rhythm of our cycles can help us live a more balanced, productive life, and recommend syncing everything from our diaries to our diets and our exercise with our monthly changes. Others simply advise learning your own cycle to tune in to your body and respond accordingly. On TikTok, the hashtags #cycletracking and #cyclesyncing have attracted 87m and 483m views respectively. Meanwhile, global Google searches for the term have more than doubled in the past year.
Big Tech has taken note. Periods are lucrative (52% of the population, who knew!) and a whole industry has sprung up around menstruation in the past few years, developing past the classic cycle tracking GUTTER CREDIT apps (now used by over 100 million women across the world) and offering in-depth analysis of temperature fluctuations, mood changes and heart rate. Fitness brands such as Fitbit, Whoop and Nike have i
